Death of a disbeliever.

I feel claustrophobic. I can't move. I can't see. The darkness blinds me as the heat overpowers my breath. This tight space is suffocating me. There is no way out. My body is lifeless and still, yet my soul is more alive than ever. How long must I endure this constricting space? My soul cries for help, but nobody can hear me. My soul screams for mercy, but nobody can here me. My soul is tired and exhausted from trying to escape. What did I do to deserve such pain and torture? I am frightened and scared. What is going to happen next? Should I have listened to my believing brothers and sisters? Should I have read more of the Qur'an and listened to the teachings of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)? But I wanted to enjoy the worldy life! There was so much to offer! Everything seemed so beautiful and tempting, I really couldn't resist! But....where is shaitan? He was the one that helped me with all this! He said he would accompany me every step of the way! But where is he now? Will he help me get out of here?

"Verily, Allâh promised you a promise of truth. And I too promised you, but I betrayed you. I had no authority over you except that I called you, so you responded to me. So blame me not, but blame yourselves. I cannot help you, nor can you help me. I deny your former act in associating me (Satan) as a partner with Allâh (by obeying me in the life of the world). Verily, there is a painful torment for the Zâlimûn (polytheists and wrong-doers, etc.)." Ibrahiim 14:22

I should have believed in my Lord. I should have been more committed to my Islam. I should have followed the sunnah of the Prophet (pbuh). Why did I let the worldy life take over? I wanted just to be like everyone else! I swear I was going to start being a servant of Allah instead of a servant to the shatian!!! I swear! 

But it's too late now as I know where my destiny belongs:

  

"The disbeliever’s soul will then scatter, dispersing throughout his body, but the Angel of Death will rip it out violently similar to how a skewer [with many forks] is yanked through wet wool [ripping with it the veins and nerves].[Every angel between the heaven and earth and every angel in the heaven will curse the person. The gates of heaven will be closed and there will be no group of gatekeepers except that those angels will call upon Allah, asking that his soul does not ascend by way of them]. The Angel of Death will take the soul and when he has taken it, the other angels do not leave it in his had even for the blink of an eye before they put the soul into that sackcloth (of fire). There will emit from the soul a stench more disgusting, offensive than any decaying carcass found on the surface of the earth. " Aḥkām al-Janāiz wa Bidau’ha (no. 105, pp. 198-202)