Take a selfie of our characters! What would we see?



 Abu Darda (RadiAllahu Anhu) reported that Rasulullah (Sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) said, “Nothing is weightier on the Scale of Deeds than one’s good manners.”(Al-Bukhari)

As we spend countless hours standing in front of the mirror, combing our beards, making sure our pants are above the ankles, fixing our niqab's and making sure our abaya's are clean and ironed, we tend to forget about fixing what is inside of us. Surely, trying to follow the Qur'an and Sunnah to the best of our abilities is important and highly encouraged, but sometimes we focus too much on our outer appearance and we neglect our inner appearance. Though nobody can see the colour of our hearts or can read our thoughts, Allah Knows everything that lies within ourselves. 

Many of us worry too often about our physical, outer Islam yet neglect the inner, intangible Islam. Surely, the physical aspect of Islam is important and our physical worship is extremely valuable and does help us become better Muslims, but until the inner part of us is clean and pure, then only will our outer Islam be sincerely for the sake of Allah. Allah, the Almighty looks more to the hearts and our sincere actions more than anything else and it seems these days, many of us forget this. 

Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Allah does not look at your appearance or wealth, but rather He looks at your hearts and actions.” ( Sahih Muslim 2564)
Since I reverted to Islam, I have met many wonderful sisters online and offline who have shown me countless times of the beauty of Islam through their manners and good character. They always greet me with a smile and send me a random message and to let me know that they were thinking of me and wanted to say Salam. They genuinely want to talk to me and they never message me just because they need something. They try to follow the manners and etiquette of the Prophet Muhammad (sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) and it just makes me feel so special and that there are some sisters who truly do love me for the sake of Allah. Unfortunately, I can only count a handful of these lovely sisters on one hand, may Allah reward them and continue to beautify their character. It seems these days many sisters place more concern with their exterior appearance and neglect the inner. Many of us may look like a Muslim but the way some of us act online, in public, and in secret are unacceptable. Islam is about good manners and there is a lot of reward for those who show beautiful manners and etiquette (while of course implementing the Qur'an and Sunnah). 

Abu Hurairah (RadiAllahu Anhu) said, “I heard Abu al Qasim (Rasulullah (Sallalahu aleyhi wasselam)), say, ‘The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners, so long as they develop a sense of understanding.” (Al-Bukhari)

Of course this is a reminder to myself first and foremost, as I truly feel this is something that I struggle with on a day to day basis. As I delve deeper into the true teachings of the Qur'an and Sunnah and learn more about our beloved prophet Muhammad (sallalhu aleyhi wasselam) and how he had the most beautiful character and dealt with people with the finest of manners, I can't help but feel compelled to follow his footsteps. Coming from a background where good manners and etiquette were never really practised in my culture, it really is a challenge. Some people were born into good manners and others, not so much. I consider myself the latter and I have learnt just how important it is to practise what we preach. We should all be working hard on beautifying our character and walking on this earth with the best of manners. We should be showing the non-Muslims the beauty of Islam through the way we carry ourselves and as well to those Muslims who are far from the deen. Just because our exterior is beautiful and it physically portrays Islam, it does not mean that we have the right to be rude to people, not send Salams, curse and backbite, and other acts that are disrespectful and not part of the deen. 

Abd Allah ibn ‘Amr said, “Rasulullah (Sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) was never obscene or coarse. Rather, he used to tell us that the best among us were those with the best manners.” (Al-Bukhari)

What is more beautiful than a Muslim sister who knows the importance of beautifying her heart so that her deeds would be sincere and purely for the sake of Allah? When I see a sister with beautiful character, I can't help but want to emulate her actions and it really motivates me to want to focus more on my inner character so that it will shine through on the outside. Having the most expensive abaya or dressing in all black does not mean anything if you will continue to treat others without respect while looking down on them. Just because you wear the niqab and cover your face, it does not mean that you have the right to judge others who do not dress the same as you. How do we call others to Islam if we can not even show to them the kind manners and good character of a believer? We must always remember, 

 Rasulullah (Sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) said: “The most beloved of Allah’s servants to Allah are those with the best manners.” (At-Tabarâni and Albani authenticated it in Silsilatul-AHaadeethis-Saheehah
 How easy it is to attain the status of one who prays the night prayer, and how easy it is to be granted al-Jannah just by exercising good manners towards one another (and of course fulfilling the obligatory before anything)!

 Abu Hurairah (
RadiAllahu Anhu) said that Rasulullah (Sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) said, “If one has good manners, one may attain the same level of merit as those who spend their nights in prayer.” (Al-Bukhari)

 Let us all reflect upon the beautiful manners that our beloved prophet (sallalahu aleyhi wasselam) had and let us follow in his footsteps and those after him.  We should take care of our outer appearance but we should also remember never to neglect what is in our hearts because that is truly what Allah cares about the most! Remember to always keep your intentions clean and to remember not to put your outer appearance before your inner. With a clean heart and the right intentions, our manners should cloak our outer appearance with beauty. May Allah bless us all with good character and manners and keep our intentions purely for His Sake and may Allah give me and all of us the tawfeeq to practise what we preach ameen!

3 comments

  1. Assalam Alaikom wa rahmatAllahu wabarakatahu. Jazak Allahu Khaira for this post sister! Such a great reminder, I'm actually working on a similar post about manners as I find it's something our Ummah tends to neglect nowadays. May Allah(SWT) guide us towards emulating the manners of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and his companions.

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  2. Assalaamu alaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh.

    Aameen

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  3. Mashallah Ukhti that is soo true, we have become so concerned with our physical attributes when deep down we know our Master judges us on our insides. On our intentions and most importantly our actions. May Allah forgive us. Allahumma Ameen.

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Assalamualaikum, please be mindful about what you are about to write. Think about it before writing and make sure it is something positive and beneficial, otherwise it will be deleted and ignored. JazakiAllah kheyr ! Sisters ONLY! xo